We've added a fourth child to our family since I last wrote in July, hence the reason I haven't written.
Life with four little ones under six is fantastic and challenging and insane and a dream come true. However, I haven't figured out how to "do it all," nor do I intend to. So a good number of things, like writing, move to the back burner while I press in here and focus on the items high on my priority list.
To have the opportunity to raise our little blend of biological, adopted, and currently fostered children (a true coming-together of several goals and passions) is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and my commitment to running this stretch of my race well only intensifies with time.
Of course, I fall short of "well" every day, and occasionally hide in a locked bathroom. My days are far from glamorous. But glamor is for the birds. Give me fortitude and perseverance and patience.
Kristian and I have a mantra: Don't reject the significant for the sensational.
When days (or nights) are spent on this work that feels tiresome, repetitive, meaningless, and totally unnoticed, there's this unique opportunity to see a gift. There is great value and beauty in the humble and small things in this life.
And of course, the real truth is that the work of raising tiny humans to grow into kind, brave, compassionate, thoughtful, engaged adults (Lord-willing) is not at all a small thing. It's not menial work below an education level or pay-grade.
As I write, heated times are escalating in our Nation. Yet I believe hate is combated when we each steward well that which is entrusted to us by promoting and exemplifying love. I am committed to dedicating significant effort towards raising children who pursue compassion, look for the needy, sit with the hurting, live generously, and default to seeing others' worth.
And if those lessons begin with my example before them- in the changing of diapers, rocking away tears, listening empathetically to fears, apologizing when I'm wrong, welcoming folks into our home, and serving up yet another meal- then I commit to persevering with constant prayers for strength, finding the joy that is promised in the midst of it all.
I will no doubt look back on this season as an exhausting and rigorous one, yet one so uniquely full of beauty, depth, and growth. I may feel like I daily reach 'empty,' but the Lord is always, always faithful to sustain me, fill me, and strengthen me again.